all these waaay-too-california moments happened right when i got back from Japan . .. and reminded me why i am so ashamed to be from here.
#1
I was in the health food store. The cashier was eyeing my tofu and soymilk with distaste, saying that it was kind of a sellout health food, and the real health food was – no kidding – hemp oil. “There have been studies, man.” At that point, the guy in line before me came back, saying, “Yeah, that’s amazing. Right on. Hey, wait — you charged me for the completely wrong stuff.” Cut to commercial.
#2
Driving down Lombard street in San Francisco. Even though it is a green light, the guy next to me screeches his brakes. I stop too, to see what the fuss is about. Some blonde pony tail woman is so into her cellphone conversation that she walked into a 4 lane road when her light was red. And here is the amazing part – her face shows the fear and shock appropriate to someone who just came within a foot of death, but somehow SHE IS STILL TALKING ON HER CELLPHONE. Like, perhaps she is. .. NARRARATING the whole thing to Ashley or Tiffany or whomever??
#3,
me and my pal go out to dinner. A few minutes later, a white-guy-asian-lady couple sits down next to us. A few minutes after THAT, another white-guy-asian-lady couple sits down on the other side of us. The first guy had his fucking blackberry PDA out on the table all blinking so everyone could see how important he was. The other jive turkey was dating a fine buisnesswoman in dignified black pant-suit, but he was some dungeon-master-looking clown with flip flops. At least asian women from Thailand or the philipines have third-world-poverty as an excuse for sleeping with utter tools. What the hell is going on here??
This entry was posted
on Thursday, March 30th, 2006 at 3:56 pm and is filed under Uncategorized, things I did, i hate it so much. . .!.
You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
all these waaay-too-california moments happened right when i got back from Japan . .. and reminded me why i am so ashamed to be from here.
#1
I was in the health food store. The cashier was eyeing my tofu and soymilk with distaste, saying that it was kind of a sellout health food, and the real health food was – no kidding – hemp oil. “There have been studies, man.” At that point, the guy in line before me came back, saying, “Yeah, that’s amazing. Right on. Hey, wait — you charged me for the completely wrong stuff.” Cut to commercial.
#2
Driving down Lombard street in San Francisco. Even though it is a green light, the guy next to me screeches his brakes. I stop too, to see what the fuss is about. Some blonde pony tail woman is so into her cellphone conversation that she walked into a 4 lane road when her light was red. And here is the amazing part – her face shows the fear and shock appropriate to someone who just came within a foot of death, but somehow SHE IS STILL TALKING ON HER CELLPHONE. Like, perhaps she is. .. NARRARATING the whole thing to Ashley or Tiffany or whomever??
#3,
me and my pal go out to dinner. A few minutes later, a white-guy-asian-lady couple sits down next to us. A few minutes after THAT, another white-guy-asian-lady couple sits down on the other side of us. The first guy had his fucking blackberry PDA out on the table all blinking so everyone could see how important he was. The other jive turkey was dating a fine buisnesswoman in dignified black pant-suit, but he was some dungeon-master-looking clown with flip flops. At least asian women from Thailand or the philipines have third-world-poverty as an excuse for sleeping with utter tools. What the hell is going on here??
This entry was posted
on Thursday, March 30th, 2006 at 3:56 pm and is filed under Uncategorized, things I did, i hate it so much. . .!.
You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
March 31st, 2006 at 4:02 am
I’m just waiting for your norcal ass to “Get hella stupid dumb and Hyphy”
Seriously look Hyphy up in Youtube.com you’ll be very impressed. Ha.
April 13th, 2006 at 4:50 am
1. Hemp oil dude reminds me of a time I was buying a book on Witchcraft at Borders and the girl at the register looked down her nose at me and said “I don’t need spells, I just use my mind to get what I want.”
2. Cell Phone lady…well I don’t know what is up about people wanting to be joined at the ear all the time, but I wish there was a cure as I’m sure a certain male known by us both has probably done that stunt before, except I’m sure he cussed out the poor sap in the car for not paying attention AND making too much noise with his brakes.
3. Let’s face it, no offense, but American males just don’t know how to date appropriately anymore. Once upon a time it would have been considered rude to bring along a book on a date, let alone the extrememly distracting alternative entertainment module we call the Blackberry. As for the Dungeon Master Flip Flop guy… I think most people in NorCal look in the mirror and no matter what they are wearing see themselves in a finely taylored outfit appropriate for whatever outing they are going on - or they just don’t care what other people think about how they look.
February 11th, 2007 at 6:30 pm
You’re kindof a dick. Hope you realize - first of all the hypocrisy in your own statements. Should “Dungeon Master Guy” have been dating the blonde girl you hate? Or maybe some stupid bongwater smelling hippy that you revile from the health food store? And listen, I live in San Fran and I’m in Yokohama right now - there are more PDA’s here than the Bay area. So why the double standard?
I think the chick at dinner was a level 12 red mage.
I think you can’t get a hot asian girl to be your dinner date so you take it out on poorly chosen footwear.
Though - I will commiserate with you on one point - I hate all the fucking bluetooth cyborgs we have in the states.
March 16th, 2007 at 5:11 am
I’t hard to get to level 12.
Besides: Chicks usually play fighters/rogues.
Bluetooth is cool. I wish I had one.
This site rocks ass!
June 18th, 2008 at 11:08 am
Welcome back to California!! haha