Tokyo Damage Report

Shinjuku fashion check

ENGRISH OF THE DAY:

the drape is correct! NO RETAILER need hesitate in promoting the DRAPE. it is now the dominant style trend. OK, this is actually perfect english. but, i mean, damn.

SOUNDTRACK: ‘i’m going to hollywood’ – fang.

EVENT: TOKYO FASHION CHECK (shinjuku subway mall)

Basically dead. Oddly, NOT from alcohol. Just from 2 days w/o sleep or almost no food. so far this weekend, i’ve gotten taken to the police station, gotten black-out drunk, seen a medical fetish party AND an oi-punk show . . .But the weirdness is not over.

 

No time to rest because I have to go make an ass of myself in public.

I go meet Halfagirl and her pals: These 3 kids who have the most insane fashion: just parrot-head hairdos, sweaters with sort of 3-d bas-reliefs of clown heads, and crazy Vulcan cloaks with upside-down glasses.

It’s raining so we just stay inside this underground shopping mall in Shinjuku. It’s crowded as hell. We’re doing a little performance where we stand around and we hold up a sign which says basically

, ‘WHO IS THE WEIRDEST? PLEASE TELL US!’  

だれ が 一番 変な 人 ?教えて 下さい。

Most people just ignore us but the people who vote usually vote for either Halfagirl or Michel, the parrot who lives on top of her head. also we are singing happy birthday to little kids whose birthday is today. just keep this in mind.

While we do this, we’re also doing ‘FASHION CHECK.’

Fashion check works like this: if you see someone with amazing fashions (blue haired grandmas, crazy goth kids, new-wave aunties, etc.) you go chasing after them in this crowded station, and then try to make them answer some questions about their look and their lifestyle, which you then forget because you didn’t write them down.

It usually takes 20 seconds for us to even sound the alarm: “look over there!” “where?” “that guy with the coat” “that guy? what guy? the guy next to the guy?” “the coat! The COAT! Not that coat, the coat guy with um oh crap, where did he go?”.

Assuming that we DO agree on who is worthy of the FASHION CHECK, they are now like 100 feet away, which means I get to watch these girls totally tear-ass across the crowded mall in their costumes, terrorizing innocent people, as they try to hunt down their quarry.

Keep in mind, while all this is going on, male hustlers and pimps and gigolos are doing the EXACT SAME THING ? running up to women and trying to get them. And now I’ve got some crazy young GIRLS chasing after the women too.

What the hell people?

they ask the quarry about ‘lifestyle’ and ‘fashion theme’. my question is more direct: who are tokyo guys more scared of: goth girls or yamanbas (kogals)?

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