Tokyo Damage Report

old kogals.

On the train today, I sit opposite one of THEM. You know THEM. . . and you still see THEM from time to time. . . . middle-aged kogals.

Remember the schoolgirls that became world-famous in 1998 when they bleached their hair and tanned their skin and wore 18 inch platform heels and so on? . .. in fact, some women are still doing it only now they’re like 26 which is ANCIENT. And I started wondering, exactly how do these dinosaur kogals justify their time warp? If you see an old, burnt-out hippy or punk, they will tell you that the’re ‘keeping it real’ and ‘not selling out to the man.’ But the kogal deal never had that kind of political rationale. It was all about being young and trendy. So how do they justify being totally behind the times? Are they like, "all the fashions since 1997 are crap." Or are they like "dude, as long as I still look like Welcome to Thunderdome-era Tina Turner, I will remain eternally 17 years old, and that’s just how it works." or maybe they’re just, like, all, "DUDE,my fashion is TOTALLY up to date. . . i traded in my old white eyeliner for this hot new SILVER eyeliner, and my skin is the exact NEW shade of brown that’s all the rage this summer!!"

Eventually I decide this woman was a very repressed housewife in 6 years ago, and saw all the kogals running around partying while she had to iron her salariman husband’s shirts all day. Then she finally divorced him and with her newfound freedom, she’s trying to relive a mythical late-90s past which she never got to experience first hand.

What can I say, it was a long train ride.

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