Tokyo Damage Report

DSB, nervs, d-clone, stupid babies go mad, reality crisis, sex:virgin killer

April 18th @Ookubo Earthdom : "SEX OR DIE" record release party



. . . AKA d.s.b.

The vocal actually moves around MORE when he straps on a guitar. He sang the first few songs while balanced on top of the monitor with both feet, his head wedged against the low club ceiling, holding the mic with one hand and punching the air with the other.

The dummer had this amazing fashion: leapord pants, no shirt, matching leapord hankerchief. he is super intense!


Above, the finale: punching the ceiling with his guitar. That thing has been through the war for sure.


This band is interesting because EVEN THOUGH they are uncompromising hardcore, THEY STILL HAVE A SENSE OF SHOWBIZ. most punks think you are either punk OR showbiz, but DSB proves you can do both. Showbiz don’t always mean being an old dude in Spandex reading pre-written lines off a TelePromPter: "HELLO INSERT NAME OF TOWN! HOW’S EVERYONE DOING TONIGHT? IS NAME OF TOWN READY TO ROCK??"

Sometimes showbiz means striking the same crazy poses night after night, and looking the audience in the eye – sacrificing spontinaiety for grandeur, dude. It is a slippery slope, to be sure, but DSB pulls it off, because the poses are done with lightning speed and fury!


They played i guess what you would call bad rock music. The singer had no talent or aggression but she must have figured if she wore a short skirt no one would notice. Whatever.

The drummer was pretty cool, though – all Fu Manchued out. He spent the whole gig hunched over and mischevious – sort of lurking over his drums and leering like a little Gollum.


The best thing about this band is their name: D-CLONE. The music was boring so I spent the whole set wondering ARE THEY TAKING THE PISS?? like, do they mean "declone, " as in "remove the clones from the scene", which would mean they would have to start by removing themselves? Or do they mean D-CLONE as in "DISCHARGE CLONE," as in, "Yeah! We are aware that there are many discharge copy bands and we happily include ourselves in that category! we are just another clone!"


Fuck, guys! Which is it? Sadly, the former seems to be true – judging from the fact that ALL THEIR AMPS HAD DISCHARGE ALBUM COVERS PAINTED ON THEM. Jesus. I mean I’m californian and we californians rightly are despised for our never-ending obsession with irony, sarcasm, and stuff. But in a case like D-CLONE. . . i mean, you’d have to admit it’s the i-word.

Not ironic – just plain stupid: the guitarist had like $1000 worth of pedals for his crusty squatter band. Like, this is not even all the pedals he had. They wouldn’t all fit in the frame! what IS ironic: his guitar still sounded like shit. Not good shit in a noisy, fuck you, punk way, but shit, in a " i have no idea what notes you are playing, in spite of your 20 pedals and giant custom amps which took 20 minutes to set up."

Honestly they weren’t bad. The singer had a lot of energy and conviction, but the bass and drummer were kind of thinking about getting some dinner, maybe some dim sum, or making the next level at Playstation, or something.





I already wrote tons of reports about these guys. So for now I’ll just let the pictures speak for themselves.

above, the guy pointing up in the center is THE SINGER, singing from the center of the crowd. Part of showbiz is writing songs that have pauses so that the band can point to things during the pause.


Since Iggy Pop invented crowd-surfing, lots of singers do it. Stupid Babies’ singer has his own twist on it, though: he WALKS ON THE ROOF.





Reality Crisis had a small but furious pit, made more violent by an inch-deep beer puddle on the floor. Guys would try to slam their friend and wind up sliding accross the whole floor, taking out suckers like bowling pins.

Sorry for the shitty photo. Those are boots up there.






Live show ? questions of authenticity.

the band is called SEX VIRGIN KILLER. I think there’s a dash or semicolon in there somewhere. The live show tonight is to celebrate the release of their newest masterpiece, SEX OR DIE.


Even though they started around 2 years ago, they look like a Visual Kei band from the early ’90s. Probably because the band members are old guys! When i asked my punker friends "Do you like this sort of glam rock?, " my friends replied that SEX VIRGIN KILLER was "glam with punk attitude," but I have no idea what htat means, other than punk incompetence or maybe the punk tendency to want to go back to the past.


Probably the unglamorous truth was just, the punks were friends with SEX VIRGIN KILLER from the olden days, and were coming out of loyalty.

They kept trying to do iron maiden style harmony leads and fucking up. They couldn’t sing either, but that is normal for glam bands in japan. (Sorry, internet nerd girls!) The drummer , despite his preposterously huge drum kit, couldn’t do double-bass either. But he had the most energy of anyone in the band – headbanging and grimacing and getting just totally non-stop spastic with every part of his body. He made Tommy Lee look like the drummer for Motley Crue.


Probably the most interesting thing about the band was their hair. Now that sounds so obvious, you’re probably going, "duh, sherlock." But the hair was not just huge, it was subtle. For instance, the spikes only went halfway and then drooped. At first i was like, ok, they ran out of aquanet, but in fact this was deliberate: the loose ends allowed them to get some vintage Cinderella-style headbanging action, while the spikey foundation kept their hair huge. This was an engineering triumph, but it was not to last. As the show went on, you could gradually see their hairdos collapsing like a Los Angeles hillside in a mud-fire. First the bass-player. Then the rhythm guitarist. The vocalist seemed to have almost gravity-proof hair, possibly involving buttresses or armatures of some sort. Please write to the band directly and request a .PDF file of the blueprints of dude’s hair because it is pretty much bomb-proof. Shit did not budge despite 40 minutes of headbanging. You could hide your whole family inside one of those and survive an air raid. Keep some pork and beans in there.

my second-favorite thing about Sex Virgin Killer was how, by being really phoney, they tended to call "real hardcore" into question. They didn’t even do as many arena-rock cliches (foot on monitor, guitar held over head) as the "authentic" punk bands, which sort of makes you ask yourself, what is showbiz, and what is posing?

People tended to make fun of the glam band’s groupies for going apeshit during Sex Virgin Killer’s set. . . which was ironic because there were waaay more punk groupies at the show who were way skeevier. Maybe it’s just me but, did the Punk groupies get really self conscious when they saw the glam groupies doing their thing? The punk groupies were like, "Oh shit, is that how i look from the outside?"



But at any rate it is nice to more than one style of music at a live show, finally!


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